Thursday, June 3, 2010

You're Invited!

....to obsess with me.

The phone lines have been down this week so far in Ethiopia. These families with court dates on June 1 must be going crazy. I know I would be. I keep checking their blogs hourly just in case the phone lines come up and they hear good news. So when it comes time for our court date. Well, yeah, crazy might not be crazy enough a word to describe my feelings.

Current obsession, after I've checked on families with court dates, is looking at the list. While there is a wide range of time lines our agency gives as reference, the date you get your referral, court date and US embassy date all seem arbitrary. I know that they are not, as every child has it's own history and paperwork and situation that affect everything. On the outside looking in, why two families that receive a referral the same week can then go on markedly different wait times for a court date etc. does seem arbitrary. Even though it's not. This is currently happening. One family in Ethiopia bringing a child home and one family still waiting for a court date. But they received their referral within days of each other. ahhhhhhhhh. The hows and the whys are all just part of this process of InternationalAdoption. Sometimes the answers are simple and sometime there are simply no answers.

But still. I obsess. Currently we are around number 8 on the list. Last year during the month of June there were more than 10 referrals. Of those almost all passed court before court closed for the rainy season. BUT that was last year before the new laws were passed therefore probably not best to compare, right? Yeah. But. Oh how I would love for this to happen again this year! Because yes, it would be great to get baby home asap...but also because our bonding time, my maternity leave (which will be unpaid. hot topic for another post.) would be happening end of summer into early Fall. Perfect for NYC. I was swinging in the hammock with Davis last night and all I could think of is how awesome it will be to do this holding both of my children. Which won't be happening in November-February folks. In fact for me November is the most miserable month here...the days are short. It's dark in the morning and it's dark by 4pm. I'll take the snow and rain in April over the November dark any day. ok, if I am totally honest when it's freezing cold in February I'm pretty miserable too. November seems to mark the end of Fall, so that stands out and best illustrates my obsession over timing. ;)

Crazy. Yes, I'm obsessing and working out calendar days on something completely 100% out of my control and really cannot be compared to this case or that case or what happened last year. Because when we do receive our referral, it will be our case. And our case will be unique. Maybe everything will be in perfect order and we will be expedited through the system and maybe it will be quite the opposite. For now, I will sit on the side that is happy and hopeful all is in order for us to hear news soon, and time is on our side. Even if it's not, I know in the end none of this will matter and life will be good.

But.

It sure does pass the time to obsess a little, no?

5 comments:

  1. I am right there with you. My husband doesn't seem to have that level of "crazy" that I do about other people's court dates! At this stage of the game, obsession would be an understatement for me. I think I have transitioned into certified stalker of anyone who is in the process of International Adoption. Ridiculous!

    Joanna Lovin
    lovinadoption.blogspot.com

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  2. The real sickness is that I"m doing the same exact thing you described in your post and we are still waiting for our 171-H. It's going to be a long year (at least!)

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  3. Joanna. I need an invite to read your blog. How can I possibly stalk YOU if I can't read your blog!? ha. Send me an email... hgdnyc @ yahoo.com
    Then we can obsess together!

    Julie, no worries, you are normal in my book. I started the stalking early too. :)

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  4. I am so hoping to get a referral before the courts close. I keep praying that there will be referrals with week. Hang in there - Laura

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  5. I say - obsess away if it's what gets you through!I'm right there with you.
    LET'S GO ALREADY!!!!

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