Thursday, March 15, 2012
March 15, 2011 we were given the most awesome responsibility & amazing gift of raising a son. For us, this day was a day we had been dreaming of for more than two years. It marked the end of the roller coaster of "the wait" and the beginning of life as a family of four. Our joy was beautiful and pure.
For Bekalu, it marked a day when his life was again turned on end. Another BIG change. He had no choice, no say, no voice. When they brought him to us he was a ball of nerves and so terrified. His heart was pounding and he was stiff from fear. Who are these people? Why do they smell funny? What are they saying? WHERE AM I? These are the questions I imagine were running through his head. For these reasons we kept our joy calm and did not celebrate as you would think we might have. We tried to see the world through his eyes.
He arrived wearing layers of clothes and little jeans with pink bows and socks that were too small. For the longest time I could open the bag where we keep them and they still smelled of his foster center. The sweet smelling soap they must have used to clean everything is unforgettable. (I was so sad to discover last month the smell is now gone.) We did not immediately undress him and bathe him and look him over inch by inch. Oh how I wanted to though, I had missed an entire year with my son and I wanted to kiss every inch of him. But again, we saw through Bekalu's eyes, and patiently, we waited.
A few mornings later he woke for the first time with a smile instead of a confused cry. We were so relieved and happy. And honestly the past year has gotten better and better every day. We've had ups and downs but for the most part we have been lucky Bek settled in and quickly found his place in our family. So much so none of us can remember life without him in it.
Bekalu John, brother, son, beautiful beautiful baby boy, we love you SO MUCH. May you always know and trust that we are forever yours and you are forever ours. Family, Forever.